Where Did It All Go Wrong?
by lilythesilly
Summary: Future Fic. The Goode's will face their hardest cover yet: a normal family.


One dinner. All they needed to do was get through one dinner. But in the Goode household, that was easier said than done.

"Zach! Seriously, they are going to be here in ten minutes and forty-three seconds. Would it kill you to get up off the couch? Or at least put on a shirt?" Cammie Goode was in no way an ideal housewife, and not just because she was a CIA Operative. Like her mother, she could not cook to save her life. If it couldn't be made from a box, they would order take out. Zach was the good cook, the one with OCD (blamed on his Blackthorne days, naturally) who made sure the house looked pristine. But Zach had just returned from a mission and had been pretty bitchy ever since.

"You never complain when I walk around shirtless, in fact I disctintly remember that you like to-"

"Zach!" Cammie exclaimed, "Can we not? For one, your children are upstairs getting ready _like you should be doing, _and two, your attitude as of late is by no means a turn on." He glared at her and was about to throw out another sarcastic comment when Cammie pulled him off the couch and into a headlock, "Upstairs. Dressed. _Now._" Another remark almost made its way out of his mouth but she tightened her hold around his neck. He rolled his eyes and sighed in defeat.

Cammie let go and rolled her eyes as Zach walked away muttering, "I don't see why we need to dress up for a dinner with _Jimmy_." Followed by a long string of swear words in Farsi.

She returned to the kitchen and looked at the roast in the pan. All she needed to do was put it in the oven, right? It couldn't be that hard. Defusing the bomb that was placed in the President's desk drawer was hard. But cooking a roast? Not hard at all.

After putting the roast in the oven she returned to the stove where a pot of pasta was sitting on the burner. She looked inside the pot and wrinkled her nose. The water was supposed to evaporate out of the pot, right? Maybe she just needed to leave it longer.

Zach walked in a minute later, dressed in a green button up (holy crap did it bring out his eyes) and walked over to the stove, picking up the pot, and taking it over to the sink. "I know you think that the water will just evaporate, but you actually need to drain it, sweetie."

Cammie made a mental note for another time when her son came running into the room, "Mom, have you seen my Batmobile? Batman has to diffuse a bomb the Joker created, but its all the way on the other side of Gotham City and he needs his Batmobile to get there, otherwise everyone in Gotham City will die and it will be _all my fault!_"

Cammie stared at her son for a minute before Zach piped up, "It's in your toy chest, Chris."

Chris shook his head, "No it isn't! I already checked!"

"Did you check under your Captain America shield?"

Chris thought for a moment and then turned around and ran upstairs. Cammie heard the toy chest open and several toys (which Zach would clean up later) being thrown out. After a minute she heard him yell, "I FOUND IT! PEACE IS RESTORED IN GOTHAM ONCE AGAIN! THANKS DAD!"

Zach shook his head and opened the oven and peered inside, "Congrats, Gallagher Girl! I really had my money on you burning this thing tonight."

Cammie stared at him, "Okay, I've been ignoring it for the past two days but it really needs to be said: you're being bitchy," when Zach opened his mouth to protest but she interrupted him, "You heard me right. You're being bitchy and I want to know why."

Zach glared at her, "I am not being bitchy. That is a term you use to describe a sixteen year old girl, and I am a man. A tweny-nine year old man."

Before Cammie could reply her daughter ran in, "Mommy, mommy, mommy! I forgot to tell you something when you picked me up from Aunty Bex an Uncle Grant's house this afternoon!"

Cammie rubbed her temple and looked at her daughter, "What is it, Morgan?"

Morgan took a seat at the table and propped her chin on her fist, "Well, being the amazing spy I am, I overheard Aunty Bex telling Uncle Grant that she has a security tape of you and daddy shacking up in the elevator." Cammie's eyes widened, and Zach dropped the towel he was cleaning his hands with. Morgan tilted her head to the side, "Mommy, what does shacking up mean? Is that a defense move? Will you teach me how to do it?" She asked.

"That is something that you will never learn to do." Zach said darkly, "At least until you're thirty-nine." He added as an afterthought. Cammie stood in front of the counter, still blinking. She could've sworn they disabled of all of the cameras when they got in the elevator.

Morgan got up and ran over to Zach and grabbed his hand, "Daddy, after we have dinner with the normal people, will you read me the story about the princess who was secretly a killer?"

Zach kissed her temple, "Of course, baby. Go on upstairs and play with your brother," She nodded and waved at both of her parents before turning around to run back up the stairs. Zach looked at Cammie and sighed, "We need to steal that tape when we go over for lunch on Sunday."

"Or we could just stop having sex in the office." Zach gave her a look and she sighed. That was never going to happen. "Back to what we were discussing before-"

"You mean me being bitchy?"

Cammie glared at him, "Yes. I swear, ever since you got back from that mission and I told you about this dinner you've been-oh you've got to be _kidding_."

Zach didn't say anything an as he was about to the doorbell rang, "I'll get that. You take that roast out of the oven before you ruin it." He opened the door and grinned, "Hello DeeDee! Its great to see you again!" His smile turned into a smirk, "Hey Jimmy."

Josh grumbled a greeting as he walked in. DeeDee continued to smile and tugged on the little girls hand. A little girl Zach hadn't seen because she was hiding behind DeeDee's legs, "Say hello to Zach, Kirsten!"

The little girl blinked at him for a few seconds, and then broke out into a shy smile and waved. Zach smiled and led them into the living room where Josh was talking to Cammie.

"So, how've you been Josh?" She asked him.

Josh looked around their house awkwardly, "I've been good. I took over my dad's pharmacy a few years ago," Zach rolled his eyes, "I actually just got back from a conference this morning. I'm still pretty tired, in all honesty I didn't even want-"

"Josh! Why don't you go back to the car and grab Kirsten's sweater?" She glared at her husband. Josh sighed and nodded, grabbing his keys out of his pocket. Zach snickered as he walked out. Cammie glared at him and was about to smack him when DeeDee asked, "Where's your restroom?"

"Down the hall, third door on the right." She answered. Once DeeDee was out of sight and hearing distance she smacked Zach on the back of the head. "Could you be any more rude?"

"Actually, yes I could."

"What is your problem?" She hissed.

Zach's eyes hardened for a moment, "I don't know if you've realized this, _Cammie_," She flinched at the way he spat out her name, "but when I return from a four month long mission, half of which I was being held captive by the way, I don't want to spend my first few days at home planning a dinner with my wife's ex-boyfriend and his family. I'd rather spend it with my own family. Alone."

Cammie blinked. Now she felt bad, because she really hadn't realized it before he pointed it out. When DeeDee ran into her at the supermarket and suggested they have dinner when both of their husbands were back in town she had immediately agreed, because at the time it was the perfect distraction. She walked over to him and grabbed his hand, "I'm sorry, I didn't realize. You know how I get when I have something set in my mind, even though there's no excuse. And since we've established this isn't a jealousy thing, can we just get through the evening? Please?"

Zach sighed and then nodded. Cammie smiled and leaned in to kiss him softly and buried her face in the crook of his neck, "I promise I'll make it up to you when the kids are at my mom's tomorrow."

Zach smirked, "I'm holding you to that, Gallagher Girl."

"Why do they do that, Morgan?"

"I have no idea, Chris. MOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMYYYYYYY. We're hungry!"

Cammie turned to look at her children as Josh walked back in with his daughter's sweater, "Lets go into the dining room, dinner is ready."

Chris and Morgan climbed down the stairs, "We're eating in the dining room tonight, that must mean we're eating with civilians." He told his sister, who wrinkled her nose in response.

DeeDee walked in with Kirsten a minute later and took a seat next to Josh as Cammie brought the food out. Kirsten took one look at the platter and screamed, almost making Cammie drop the platter onto the floor.

"What's the matter, honey?" DeeDee asked her daughter.

Kirsten began to cry, "She made meat! She hurt a poor aminal! She's a killer!"

Morgan giggled and leaned in and whispered to her brother, "That's silly. Everyone knows daddy is the killer." Zach gave his daughter a look and she giggled before making a locking motion over her lips.

Kirsten stared at the platter for a few moments before reaching over and picking a piece of meat off of it and throwing it across the room where it hit the wall with a loud _splat!_

Both Cammie and DeeDee's eyes widened, "Kirsten!" DeeDee scolded.

Josh shook his head, "You really need to start disciplining your daughter, Dee."

DeeDee glared at Josh and he shrunk back in his seat a little, "Oh. So now she's my daughter now? Okay. Well, I'll take_ my_ daughter to _my_ house where we will sleep in _my_ bed. You can sleep on _your_ couch." And with that, she grabbed Kirsten's hand and stormed out of the house. Josh gave Cammie and Zach a guilty look before muttering an apology and left the house.

Morgan looked around, and then picked up a spoonful of peas and flicked them at her brother. Chris whined and Cammie glared at her daughter, "What?" Morgan squeaked, "She can do it and I can't?" She sniffed and turned her nose up, "And to think, I almost told you that I hacked into the CIA mainframe this morning." She turned to her brother, "C'mon, Chris. Let's go pick the lock on the attic door and look for our Christmas presents." Chris nodded and looked at his parents before scrambling out of his chair and running up the stairs after his sister.

Zach just smirked and began eating.

Cammie sighed. One dinner. All they needed to do was get through one dinner.

* * *

**Author's Note: **I have no idea where this came from. I was up late one night and this just spilled out over the doc. It's my headcanon that Zach and Cammie have the weirdest and abnormal family because their children were raised like spies. The ending just kind of happened. I'm trying to crank out as much GG as I can in order to fill the void in my heart that has yet to be filled by the next book. What are your thoughts?


End file.
